When 'Just Be Patient' Is Bad Advice: A Survival Guide for the Rest of Us

Life is short, and sometimes life makes patience feel like a luxury that I can’t afford.

I'm not a naturally patient person. If I want something, I don't want to wait for it. I will work for it, and I will find a way to get it. Life is short, and sometimes life makes patience feel like a luxury that I can’t afford.

I know I’m not alone—a lot of us are impatient because it feels like we never have enough time in the day. A lot of us are impatient because we’re conditioned to thrive on the false sense of urgency that society has imposed on us. A lot of us are impatient because we know that nobody is coming to save us if our lives take a turn for the worse.

We're impatient because we're drowning in a culture of urgency, because we've seen how quickly fortunes can change, because we know that in this world, nobody is coming to save us.

It's easy for the most privileged among us to preach patience from their ivory towers, because they've never felt the ground crumbling beneath their feet. They've never had to wonder whether or not they would survive "the wait."

What about the rest of us?

How do we find patience in a world that has shown us, time and time again, that it won't wait for us?

The answer lies not in denying the validity of our urgency, but in understanding it. Our impatience is a signal—much like pain, hunger, and fear—but signals aren't always truth-tellers, they're messengers. Even the most urgent message needs to be read carefully.

Think of the impatient voice in your head as a friend who loves you and wants the best for you, but sometimes needs you to help them see the bigger picture. They've stuck by your side through hard times. They want to protect you, but sometimes their perspective is shaped by old wounds instead of present dangers.

Your job is not to silence this friend, but to honor their perspective without ignoring your inner wisdom.

When they scream that you can't afford to rest, remind them that burning out will only slow you down.

When they worry that you're falling behind, remind them that comparisons don’t matter when you’re focused on fulfilling your unique, divine purpose.

When they beg you to ignore the red flags and move forward, remind them that it's better to slowly find your groove than rush into misalignment.

This is how you make peace with time: by learning that patience isn't waiting for your life to begin—it's trusting that it already has.

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A note on my writing process: This piece was refined with the help of Type, an AI writing assistant that helped me to explore different ways to articulate my thoughts. Type didn’t write for me, but it did help me to sharpen my metaphors and strengthen my narrative arc. If you’re interested in elevating your own writing while maintaining your authentic voice, you can try Type at type.ai.